2015 was
the year I decided not to write a resolution list and instead focus on tackling
one main issue; finding balance at a time when I felt the most unbalanced. I
didn’t know where to start as feeling unbalanced means you’re usually lost somewhere
between the beginning and the end. I eventually sought a beginning in my
reading challenge, hoping to balance between my Arabic and English reads. I
read a total of 39 books, 12 of which were in Arabic. Not so balanced but an
improvement from the previous year, I read 9. My brain was in a default setting
of being negative, I tried to stay positive most of the time, reminding myself
of the goals I hope to achieve one day. So I wore my “Have faith in your dreams”
bracelet more often as a constant reminder to stay positive. I tried to find
balance between my worries and what to actually do about it and so I turned to writing;
as I express myself better through it. The first half of the year passed and I
finally felt a bit more balanced with things slowly falling into place. I was
ready to face the next 6 months with a clear plan of what I should do next. I
knew balance will come with being content and I looked for what made me happy
for 100 days non-stop, I appreciated my life more. In September, I left to
London to start my MSc, and it took me a bit of time to rebalance myself. I
eventually found a way, albeit the lack of sleep, to fit in random reading
sessions on my commutes, write when I can’t fall asleep and finish my
university work without leaving it to the last minute.
I’m happy
with decisions I’ve made this year. I’m proud of stepping up to what I think is
right, facing those who I wouldn’t usually argue against. It’s the end of the
year and I wouldn’t say I feel well balanced, but I’m in a more balanced place
than I was in January. With 2016 comes the will of finding a new mindset and
continuing with finding balance.
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